The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper
I recently had a session with someone who was telling me about how he feels so comfortable talking with his work colleagues, but when it comes to meeting and talking with people socially, he just cannot do it.
I stopped him there to tell him to pay close attention to when he says ‘I can't…’
Then he proceeded to recount stories from his past, which supported his theory that he cannot do relationships in his personal life.
I told him that all of the stories he was referring to were only supporting the same beliefs and the same narrative. The logic was circular. In other words, his theory was based predominantly on habit.
Then he said: “But isn’t it too late to change all that...these narratives that started from childhood?”
I said: “No. The days of the hardwired brain are long gone. We live in the age of neural plasticity. Our brains are always changing and we have more agency in that process than we had ever imagined.”
I stopped him there to tell him to pay close attention to when he says ‘I can't…’
Then he proceeded to recount stories from his past, which supported his theory that he cannot do relationships in his personal life.
I told him that all of the stories he was referring to were only supporting the same beliefs and the same narrative. The logic was circular. In other words, his theory was based predominantly on habit.
Then he said: “But isn’t it too late to change all that...these narratives that started from childhood?”
I said: “No. The days of the hardwired brain are long gone. We live in the age of neural plasticity. Our brains are always changing and we have more agency in that process than we had ever imagined.”
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