At one point in the session I stopped them and said something along the lines of how easy it is for me to sit where I am sitting and to see things clearly, and that if I were in their shoes I'd be getting into fights with my wife too.
Pressing Pause when things heat up
We agreed that when this happens that they will try to use a code word or phrase that means that they need to take a break. We also agreed that they will reconvene within 24 hours no matter what, even if they need more time to process.
This is really hard to do when one or both members of the couple are feeling triggered. In a recent instance, she needed a break and he wanted to keep going, so he was frustrated when they took a pause, but they did reconvene within the hour and worked through it.